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Mozella Ademiluyi

Mozella Ademiluyi

A Lesson in Participation

Over a decade ago, on New Year’s Day, I left early in the morning with my husband and his best friend to attend an evening marriage celebration in New Jersey – a very different start to my new year.

The Mehndi Ceremony…a Pakistani wedding tradition… took seven hours (no exaggeration). I watched and enjoyed many beautiful dances and performances. There was much exuberance and joy as the wedding goers- some of whom were barefooted – laughed, danced, and cheered! Several family members asked me to join them on the dance floor. I turned each of them down with one excuse after another.

Having attended weddings and baby ceremonies in Karachi many years ago, I had the cultural sensitivity to understand that I was not truly in the celebration until I was actively involved in their dancing. I finally said “yes” close to 12:30 a.m.

Though tired and ready to turn in, I entered their space…and…participated. Dancing and laughing… cheering with reckless abandon… and in the back of my mind wondering, “What took me so long?” Was I that weary that I couldn’t show them I was truly there to join in their special day? Was I nervous, anxious to stand out? Was it something else?

Merely showing up is sometimes the easiest part. Life calls and invites us to participate fully in what we are doing, wherever we may find ourselves. Sometimes what comes before us is ordinary, sometimes exotic, and extraordinary.

Don’t hold back – join in when and as you can.

If we are going to be in it, then we really need to BE in it!

Immerse in the moment.

Mozella Perry Ademiluyi
speaker writer poet

p.s. We are getting to the end of this series on introspection - we are getting to the end of the summer. After spring cleaning my home, summer is the time I like to shine a light into all the dark spaces in my heart, mind, and soul. I unpack old habits and discard what no longer suits me. I invite you to do the same.

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